Today, October the 24th, 2018, it is 5 years ago my love passed away.

This, is what I wrote December 2014. I have to say, I was spot on. I have found the Grace of Grief, and the journey was worthwhile. For now, I am more resilient and feel freer and happier because of it.

Joseph Campbell was right!

December 2014,

Joseph Campbell said:

"Opportunities to find deeper powers within, come when life seems most challenging"

Whenever I feel like I cannot fall any deeper and I see no more light, I somehow find the strength to grow, and transform into a more intentional being. It comes and goes in waves, I am never there, never arrive at the security level. Life is insecure.

We grow the most through things that stretch us the most. I feel so stretched right now, I know I am about to have a growth spurt again. I lost count of the growth spurts I had, I had too many.

Fear of the future without my love is not going away. But it is not about getting rid of fear. It is about having courage...

Christmas is the holiday of light, of kindness and of (for) giving.

“What are you doing this Christmas?”

For so many Christmas is a joyful holiday, filled with love and light.

However, it turns out this question triggers some deep-rooted negative emotions for some, such as stress, sadness, frustration, conflict, and guilt.

Has Christmas become an obligation for you? A holiday where you are being pulled in all directions? You feel you can’t please them all, so you’d rather just skip it or just get it over with?

I hear to many of my friends stress about where to go, what to do, who to please and how, and no matter what they decide, they’re letting someone down. They can’t get it right, and no matter what they do, feeling guilty is the result.

"Tis the season to be jolly, fa la la la la la la la la”.

The high expectations are hard to meet for many. Christmas is a reminder of loss and grief, or not living up to the expectations.

This can tear...

Who is your cheerleader?

A little over a year ago I wrote the following post while I was with my mom for the last three weeks of her life. I miss her, but reading this again reminded me that I am grateful for the things she gave me, most importantly, MY LIFE!

She deserves nothing less than my very best effort to make my life meaningful and happy. I try and keep that in mind when I let things get to me. She is my greatest cheerleader in a way!

This post is still very relevant today. I’d like to share it with you.
Who is your cheerleader?

Precious Life (November 2016)

There are certain moments in our life when we all pause and reflect. We stop our busyness, take time to go within, and remind ourselves what is really important in life.

The beginning of a life, when a baby is born, and the end of a life.

These are the moments we remember how precious life is, what life really is all about, and what it is not about.

I am in the middle of experiencing a time where a precious...

Every day should be a day to remember.

November is the time when the poppy pins appear here in Canada.

When I first moved here, almost 15 years ago, I wondered why everyone was all of a sudden wearing the poppy pin. A tradition unfamiliar to me. Though the sentiment was, and is very familiar and personal to me.

My mom and dad lived in Rotterdam during the second world war. Well, they weren’t mom and dad yet, they were teenagers and had not met yet.

 My mom                                                                    My dad.

I was born in Rotterdam.

Rotterdam was heavily bombed...

Photo by Tim Marshall on Unsplash

The only thing I feel grateful for is LOVE. Love needs all my focus right now, so I am thankful for love. ALL the love in the world.

Last night I had a fantastic Thanksgiving dinner with friends. I am thankful for my friends being there with me.

The beautiful thing about the evening was that I felt so much love. All of my friends were obviously feeling secure and safe, knowing that they are all loved. Knowing that they are accepted for who they are. No pretences, no judgements, just fun, laughter, genuine interest and compassion.

A microcosm of the world at large.

I need to see that in my world, make it all that I see. Feeling safe and secure, feeling loved and accepted. No judgements, lots of compassion and understanding.

What the world needs today is to be thankful for the love that is there. Focus on the love that is everywhere.

Seeing only hate and fear is a lie. Looking at the love and feeling free of fear is not sticking your head in the sand,...

I am Light, you are Light, we are all Light.

Did you ever hear a song and all of a sudden emotions started welling up inside you? That just happened to me. I just heard this song, not for the first time, but somehow the words struck me this time. I have been contemplating these thoughts for a while now, and I am figuring out what choices to make that are truly in alignment with my inner self. Doubts about my abilities and the choices I made are making me feel small and scared. I think that is why this song, 'I am Light', triggered strong emotions in me this time and I had the urge to share this with you.

Please take the time to read this and contemplate with me. Feel free to share your thoughts and ideas in the comment section below this post or on my Facebook page. I'd like to hear your experiences and thoughts. I am not trying to prove a point, I just want to provoke a different way of thinking.

Even though I was raised by a catholic family, I am not religious and never felt the...